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Vandal Eyes (Part Five)

Read the story from the beginning. Too Many Cooks “Welcome to This Scampi Happening,” said the waiter. “May I suggest the calamari gumbo? It’s the chef’s specialty.” ”Can I have a few minutes to mullet over?” asked Anne. “Let minnow

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Posted in Blog, Fiction, VandalEyes

Vandal Eyes (Part Four)

Read the story from the beginning. I’ve Got Something in My Eye “Welcome to Cornea-Copia. How may I help you?” The disinterested receptionist eyed them wearily. “We need to see the doctor,” said Bonnie. “As soon as possible.” “We have

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Posted in Blog, Fiction, VandalEyes

Vandal Eyes (Part Three)

Read the story from the beginning. Talk to the Hand “Tell me again,” said Anne. “Why are we going to a craft store?” It had been a long night of fitful sleep, and now Bonnie had dragged her out of

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Posted in Blog, Fiction, VandalEyes

Vandal Eyes (Part Two)

Read the story from the beginning. What’s in the bag? “Let’s start at the beginning,” said the police detective. “What were the two of you doing in that alley?” Anne rubbed her wrists from where the cuffs had chaffed her

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Posted in Blog, Fiction, VandalEyes

Vandal Eyes (Part One)

You’ve seen them everywhere. Those little plastic googly eyes that turn everyday objects into adorable faces. Maybe you’ve seen them stuck to a poster, turning a regular photograph into an amusing parody of itself. But all this time, I bet

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Posted in Blog, Fiction, VandalEyes

Gods and Angels Month on the Vaginal Fantasy Hangout

Geek Goddess Felicia Day as Greek Goddess Venus

Thanks to the ladies of Vaginal Fantasy. You are all divine. .

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Posted in Blog, Just nerding out

It was a dark and stormy night…

For those of you who are unaware of my obsession with VandalEyes, this will mean nothing, but after two of my favorite Twitter people posted shots of their glamorous makeovers for a Cupcake Quarterly calendar shoot and a bout of

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Posted in Be Crafty, Blog

VandalEyes Fantasy World Tour (or I Really Need To Get A Job)

So, if you don’t know who Anne Wheaton and Bonnie Burton are, you might want to skip this post. Or better yet, go to vandaleyes.net or the #VandalEyes hashtag on Twitter and look at some of the pictures posted there.

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Posted in Be Crafty, Blog

VandalEyes Wall Clock

Okay, first off, don’t follow me if you think this is a crafting blog. It’s not. But I have been following the shenanigans of Bonnie Burton and Anne Wheaton and their #VandalEyes campaign for a while now, and I was

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Posted in Be Crafty, Best Of Verbatim Gibberish, Blog

Now on sale

Unremarkable & Other Stories cover art

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Things I Will Probably Regret Later
July 2022
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Goodreads
Time until the end of the world
The Big DayApril 13, 2036
13.8 years to go.