This Post Has Everything (or Go On, I Dare You)

What are you looking at?

So I figure the secret to a successful blog is getting people to read it. Okay, that might seem obvious, but bear with me for a moment. Now, the best way to get people to read your blog is either be a celebrity to start with (I am a legend in my own mind), pay people to read it (also known as cheating), or get some good media coverage. Since I am neither rich nor famous, I guess I’ll have to go with door number three.

I have a new blogging goal. I’m going to get my little blog on the front page if it’s the last thing I do. Now, I’ve been looking at the kinds of things that wind up on Freshly Pressed, and I’ve identified the common factors of successful blogs. Here they are, in no particular order:

  1. Lists. People seem to like lists of things. “Best of”, “favorites”, “to do” – it doesn’t seem to matter as long as its presented in a numbered list. No problem. I’m already ahead of the game.

  2. Arts and crafts. If you scrapbook, they will come. I’ve done one before and it was very popular so I’m introducing a new feature on the blog – dollar store crafting – in which I craft from things I find at the dollar store. This week is a dice necklace for the gamer in your life. Just buy some string or pre-made necklaces. Get some dice (these come in packages of ten for a dollar). With a power drill (if you don’t have one, I bet you know someone who does) drill a hole through one face that is slightly larger than you string or necklace. DO NOT DRILL ALL THE WAY THROUGH TO THE OTHER SIDE. If you do you will crack the die and it will be useless and you could hurt yourself in the process. Drill halfway through, then flip it over and drill through from the other side. (I learned that one the hard way.) Use a few or a bunch, just thread the string through the holes and you’ve got a necklace. (Definitely +1 to Charisma)

  3. Quotes. Successful blogs seem to have a lot of quotes. That seems simple enough.

  4. Helpful hints. Especially technology tips and news. The only thing Apple people like more than standing in line to get their products, is complaining how they don’t work right, but they’re still better than anything else. Maybe I’ll leave this one to the experts.

  5. Pictures. Lots of pictures. Mostly cats. I don’t have a pet at the moment so I took a trip to the zoo.

    Nice kitty

    Sleepy Kitty

    Baby Canadian Lynx. Already bigger than a housecat.

    Look at that face!

  6. Travel. Not in the budget, but hey, I went to the zoo. So, that’s something isn’t it? (No.)

    R.O.U.S.

  7. Interviews. I tried asking the Squirrel Monkeys some questions, but they weren’t having any part of it.

    No comment.

  8. Cartoons. Now that could be a problem. Drawing is one of “The Seventeen Things I Can’t Do”. I can’t draw. I don’t even doodle. Not poorly or rarely, but never. I guess I never learned how or my brain is deficient somehow, but I never got beyond stick figures. I even got a children’s book to try and teach myself but it didn’t help. I’m hopeless. Still, every once in a while, I’ll try again, just to see if anything has changed. It seems it’s always the things you can’t do that you want to do the most. That’s just human nature.

  9. Inspirational and tragic life stories. See above.

  10. Jokes. See above.

  11. Challenges, Games and Contests. Umm, okay. If you follow my other blog, Unlikely Realm, you know that I’m currently working on a series urban fantasy short stories (shameless self-promotion). I intend to self-publish it when (if) I finish the collection. But if you’ve read this far you know I can’t draw, so I’m willing to pay someone fifty dollars (Canadian)  for cover art. Deadline is October 30th, 2012. Amateurs and students are welcome. For more information, click here.

  12. Musings. Like I’ve said before, I don’t really care if anyone reads this blog. Its whole purpose is just to get some of the random thoughts in my head down in print before they are replaced by even weirder ones. If you enjoy it, I’m glad. It’s good writing practice, and it keeps my brain working. But I try not to get too emotionally invested, as popularity is a fickle mistress at the best of times.

  13. Also, that is such a lie. While you’re reading his I’m checking my stats for the third time this hour.

Crazed recluse and sociophobe who has taken up writing after failing at everything else. Send pizza.

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Posted in Announcements, Be Crafty, Best Of Verbatim Gibberish, Blog, I'm Just Saying, Insidious Inspiration, Whine Tasting
15 comments on “This Post Has Everything (or Go On, I Dare You)
  1. mixedupmeme says:

    Here’s a little boost. 🙂

    Like

  2. MishaBurnett says:

    Dude, you forgot sex. A good blog has got to have sex.

    Like

    • And recipes. I’ll have to do a part two.

      Like

      • MishaBurnett says:

        To be honest, I had never checked out “Freshly Pressed” before reading this–I had no idea what it was. It seems to be based on number of “likes”?

        Like

      • It’s one of those things that’s good in theory, not so much in practice. Still it can drive a lot of traffic to your site.

        Like

      • MishaBurnett says:

        Yeah, I’ve made the front page on a special interest site once, and it was a good ego boost, but it didn’t result any long term hits on my work. So much depends on the popularity of the blogger and the popularity of the subject. I noticed that several of the Fresh Press blogs today had to do with showing teachers in a positive light, for example, which is going to garner a whole lot like of likes just because of the subject matter. I’m sure that “Firefighters are good” or “Nurses are good” would work as well.

        Like

      • That was a big part of my problem with the selections. They all just seemed banal and uncontroversial. Still, it can be good exposure for someone trying to grow their blog where even a couple of follows makes a difference. As a writer, I will take all the ego boosts I can get.

        Like

  3. #8 hasn’t worked for me…. my most “popular” post thanks to search engines is a commentary I did on cartoon porn that does just the opposite for any prospective readers I find. Sadly, the above commenter seems to have a good point about what sells….

    Like

  4. Tammy says:

    Add one more ..here I am… I’ve given up on freshly pressed. I think they don’t like my google pictures. Obviously it can’t be they don’t like my great sense of humor. (I am my own legend too). 😉

    Like

  5. I still never check freshly pressed…. ever…. It’s in my way of reading my favourite bloggers…

    Like

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